The Secret of Attaining What One Desires - Just “Give”!
The secret to get what you want is revealed. Simply by giving. The reasons are explained using the classic philosophical question: “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?” The chicken and the egg, which forms the circle of life, serves as a profound analogy to giving and getting what we want: the circle of joy. The concept is explained in the clear and refreshing voice of Masami Sato, the author of ONE Book.
As humans, many of us have longings for all kinds of things. And of course, theories of economics inform us that while requirements are unlimited, resources remain limited. This provokes us to think, the more the range of resources that we have, the more the longing that we will be able to fulfill. That is why we tend to defend our resources. We feel that dividing it between others or giving the resources away will reduce the amount we can retain to get what we ourselves want. This is the basic game of success and failure that is being acted out.
Is this true, then?
What if the answer was “no”? What if it actually contradicts the secret of getting more? What if the secret to get more is simple - by giving more?
You can get something simply by giving. Just like you can have eggs by breeding chickens. Just like that. Natural. Automatic. And it’s an absolutely joyful experience.
First, let us start with a small comparison to explain things.
Chicken and Egg: the Cosmic Circle of Life
Many a philosopher has come out with this question from the beginning of time, “Which comes first, the chicken or the egg?”
The answer to this riddle is simple. It actually does not matter which came first, as both eggs and chicks are already here. Still, if we want to get better results, we can choose to start somewhere.
Giving and Receiving: the Cycle of Joy
What happens, if we pose a different question? “Which comes first, giving or receiving?”
Again, if we want a better outcome, we should choose to start somewhere. Giving off things to others is certainly easier than striving to get it first!
What happens if we are trying to get it first?
If we want to have something, naturally we try to get it. And we try to hold on to it after getting it. This is very natural to do-it makes sense intellectually.
But the actual result of ‘trying to get’ is mostly not ample and actual long term benefits.
For example, hoping to see others happy is not at all about deriving joy from them, or manipulating them to become happy. It is about how much happiness we can give them and thereby share with them. Full stop.
So how do we begin to get what we desire?
By starting from the other end of the circle- by giving generously!
When we are ready to give away first before we have even got what we hope for - what we are dreaming of - we are sending a strong message to ourselves which says, ‘there is enough, and more will come.’ It lets us feel the joy today - the joy of sharing.
We only need to give out the love generously to others. It simply comes back to us. Giving love is the only way to be generously loved. When we acknowledge everyone for the great things they do and the great qualities they have, again it comes back to us. Others acknowledge us because we acknowledge them.
In the same way, if we wanted to have enough in our life materially, financially and emotionally, we just need to share the things we want generously with others.
Some would give more physically by giving their time. Some would give more financially by giving money away. The people who give more (time, money, kindness, love, ideas) have more of these things because that’s the balance. And balance is the natural law of life.
Remind oneself of the rules of the game.
One rule: never expect a return when we give.
When we have the conviction that giving has got as its inherent part, ‘getting’ something back, we become upset when do not see the return immediately. We may even feel a slight dissatisfaction towards the receiver of our gift. And surely, nurturing a bad feeling for someone is not a proper thing to do! So we can experience the real happiness of giving when we are doing something with the knowledge that we are doing it only for ourselves - we are doing it for our own happiness!
Losing to win, giving to get..
In the beginning it may look as if we are losing. However, at some stage we recognize that taking things without giving is not an acceptable life pattern. And we have been aware of it all throughout. That is why tithing has been a normal part of the lives of many people who were leaders. And they did not do it with any fanfare so it was not done to gain popularity. It was done because it was a way of life.
Take a look around. ‘Simpler’ living things do it naturally. The bumblebees pollinate the flowers as they receive the honey so more flowers bloom in abundance. Naturally. That’s the game. They do not do it for conscience or justice. That is why they create such sustainability without even trying.
Giving is just being who we are, it is just like having; not greater or lesser. No difficulty, no conditions attached, just releasing oneself.
The essence of getting more can be stated in two steps: Give first, and do not expect to get anything in return.
When we let go and give open-handedly, what we require would come to us. On its own.